Cancer takes another one

Today I found out that a good friend lost his battle with cancer. He had been fighting it for a couple of years at least. He will be sorely missed by his friends, family, and his kids. I kind of feel like I lost another brother. This has been one tragic week. I think I may even have a few more grey hairs. Not sure why my life has been so full of tragedy and pain. Is it to make me strong? I don't feel particularly strong. In fact this week has drained nearly all my energy. I tried to take a nap and although I got maybe an hour's worth of sleep I couldn't stay asleep. I'm tired, but my body keeps wanting me to stay up. WHY?
I still remember working with Alan, he always had a bright look on his face, and a positive outlook on life in general. I never knew him without a smile. I can't blame God for taking him, but it just makes me feel like he doesn't want the happy ones to stay very long on this earth. I am posting his picture along with this post, so that others who read this will know his infectious spirit. I hate cancer, having fought it and won myself. Of course, God was really the one who won the battle for me, I couldn't have done it without him. I am thankful for my life, but it is so hard sometimes to live it.
Today in church the topic was "If you could choose when you die, what day would it be?" I have given that alot of thought and I honestly can't say. I mean, I am prepared to go, but I still feel like I have so much to accomplish before he takes me. Is that weird? Is it ego? I hope not. I want nothing to do with an ego trip, I am just not that kind of person. I know in my heart that I am nothing without Christ. This comming Thursday I will be recording my very first album with the help of the church. It is titled "Lift me up" and that is also the title of the first song. I can then scratch that off my bucket list. Maybe that will also bring a bit of happiness to me and to everyone who listens to it. (Though I am not sure how many will) I am giving a copy to my remaining family members when I go to Washington.

                                           Alan Atnip  Rest in Peace...

To everyone who reads this post, I ask for prayers and an increased awareness of the varied kinds of cancer that take the lives of so many people.